Hun, Calm Down

I know everything feels overwhelming right now

but you have to let these emotions run through you for a moment.

Just let it then breathe. It’s okay not to be okay.

In fact, sing your heart out,

run like a horse,

fly all over the world,

or anything that brings you peace.

Take this time for yourself.

Recover whatever you lost. So you can gain something new.

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Stream of Consciousness #07

Hey,

I know everything is tough right now. I know everything and everyone is against you. I know you feel like you gave so much and taken little. I know you think that no one loves you. I know you think you are not worthy. I know you can only trust certain people. I know that you know this is unhealthy. I know you. I see all of you. In fact, I am you. So I’m sorry to say that I’m sorry this is happening right now but you can get through this. So stop overthinking things. Just observe for now and see where it goes then make a plan for yourself only for you and no one else. For those who are affected by your final decision well … I hope one day they will understand.

Kind regards,

You ❤

Why I Write

It is the only thing I have. It never judged. It is a reflection of me. It is like rehab my own way. It helps me to find my way again instead of assuming that there’s nothing I can rely on. So why not continue to write as much as I can. It is everything to me. It brings me passion and peace. It gave me the reason to write no matter what I think or feel. So here I am making sure this blog is my life to which it is. Here we go.

Compromised Sanity

I feel as though

someone warped my mind into something else.

It’s like there is a parasite in my brain

that I’m trying to get it out but it wants to live there

and make me something else.

Guess what?

I want my mind back.

My mind is my mind, not yours.

Stream of Consciousness #05

Dear Me,

You know this is not healthy. It’s not right. You two rely on each other too much. In the end, you two drive each other crazy–from pain to laughter. You still think he is still worth it. You still think he can be something. I must admit … I believe in him too because I saw it in his eyes like you have. If you are right then time will show us that you two belong together.

Now you deicide to be patient. Hehe.

Kind regards,

You

Just Give Up … On Me

What took you so long?

You finally gave up on me. That’s what I wanted you do for me.

So I finally know that I lost you.

I always knew I don’t deserve something so beautiful.

Your kind of love is something different I thought. I guess I was wrong.

At least I now know I truly don’t need or want it.

Now I’ll fight my corner again till I finally give up on myself once more.

Hmmm.

Now I’m curious of how I will die.

Stream of Consciousness #04

Dear Me,

Do something! Anything! For goodness sake, why can’t do something that can help you and others at the same time? You can be pathetic but I know you do nothing because you are just scared. You’re scared of what will happen next to the point that you feel like you are going to do something that will hurt yourself really bad. Come on. You know that isn’t the answer. Do something productive. Make him proud!

So stop it! Stop feeling bad about yourself and fix your problem. It’s your problem so fix it. You know you have to whether you like it or not. So fix it. Fix it!

Yours truly,

You ❤